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AAR notes (or things bobcat is no longer allowed to do in the army)

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  • AAR notes (or things bobcat is no longer allowed to do in the army)

    i figure i might as well post a few of these since it is funny and i lack the artistic talent to make a comic.

    warning some of these might get a little weird in the future. please stop reading if you haven't been issued an unusual sense of humor. and please don't make fun of my poor grammar and spelling im a soldier not an english major.

    1 never tell people that your running det cord in the TOC(even if its clear to everyone that its realy CAT5E cable)

    2 don't run up to you section sergeant (an E-6) saying you just found a PRC 6 (pronounced pricky-6)

    3 don't feed the MOSI's

    4 when the sergeant major is inspecting the arms room is not the time or place to teach the armourer how to do his job.

    5 never call the commander out for being late to the formation he called.
    to find me, you must be good.
    to catch me, you must be quick
    to defeat me, you must be joking.

  • #2
    Never say 'NUTS' to an american sarge when he shouts 'Mars'

    Dutch WERE allowed to have long hair in the army: much to the annoyance of every professional army that was outshot at every tank exercises by those longhairs. They got their revenge when the Dutch decided a professional army would be better (including the obligatory haircut). Since then the skills went down
    Samson was right
    Last edited by metaal; 08-27-2009, 08:21 AM.
    pounce!
    --
    Metaal

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    • #3
      never "borrow" flex cuffs from supply for personal use

      it is not polite to duct tape your squad leader to his bunk when he is asleep

      when called out for cadence during a brigade run don't sing every banned cadece you know

      don't use "this IS the army " as a defence when you getting chewed out for singing banned cadences.

      don't shove red cat 5 cable into a block of crafting clay and leave it on your desk during a room inspection.
      to find me, you must be good.
      to catch me, you must be quick
      to defeat me, you must be joking.

      Comment


      • #4
        *sigh*

        All these things remind me how sad I was that I failed the psych eval to go EOD ... but they offered me sniper school.


        "See? That right there is why I check your vagina for traps every time we're about to have sex."

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by RazorJAK View Post
          *sigh*

          All these things remind me how sad I was that I failed the psych eval to go EOD ... but they offered me sniper school.
          so your not crazy enough to go EOD?

          mean time, a few more of them are in order



          no scareing the EOD guys

          don't say oops after sending up a call for fire

          don't ask the ops SGM why "quit" is in the ranger creed if its not a ranger word

          just because you now nothing will happen doesn't mean you can use the AHA for a smoking area.

          just because you can fit that many guns in your turret doesn't mean you should(and no grenades)

          don't quote jayne during patrols (sure wish we had some grenades right about now)
          to find me, you must be good.
          to catch me, you must be quick
          to defeat me, you must be joking.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by RazorJAK View Post
            *sigh*

            All these things remind me how sad I was that I failed the psych eval to go EOD ... but they offered me sniper school.
            Originally posted by bobcat35 View Post
            so your not crazy enough to go EOD?
            Actually I believe it's more of a different sort of crazy and a question of morality.

            Demolitions they like people that are a bit crazy but have a good sense of self and a lack of a death wish, not to mention team player. Really you don't want people to be too crazy when disarming a bomb or making one, I mean there is blowing shit up and then there's blowing yourself up.

            Snipers on the other hand, they want you to have a death wish, because snipers tend to go in alone, someplace danegerous, where if caught you will die. And look at the person you will kill. It's a different sort of crazy.

            explosions are very impersonal, sniping is very personal
            ***I'm quiet in a homicidal yet to kill people sorta way***

            RazorJAK says "Evil panda is ... evil. "

            Comment


            • #7
              Also: Camouflage body paint is not a uniform.
              When I was fifteen, my father thought I knew nothing. When I was twenty-five, I was amazed by how little he thought I'd learned in such a long time.

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              • #8
                Must not treaten to beat Officers with a pipe wrench to death...

                even if they are messing with my watch equipment.


                Barbie dolls out in the open during a room inspection will not be asked about....
                ***I'm quiet in a homicidal yet to kill people sorta way***

                RazorJAK says "Evil panda is ... evil. "

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                • #9
                  barbie dolls are fun.





                  to rip apart and turn into little bitty robos.

                  DO IT.
                  Call me!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    skippy's list was awesome... but can someone explain the putting kiwi on your boot comment?
                    I'm a bit like a zombie when I date. Screw the looks, give me the brains!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Kiwi is a brand of shoe polish here in the states.

                      as well as the name of a small fuzzy brown fruit, not sure what you call it down in Ausy and NZ land... ugly fruit????
                      ***I'm quiet in a homicidal yet to kill people sorta way***

                      RazorJAK says "Evil panda is ... evil. "

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        :P right I wasn't sure if you guys had Kiwi polish too or not....... wanders off to eat some kiwifruit.
                        I'm a bit like a zombie when I date. Screw the looks, give me the brains!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Rules for an army brat-
                          1) Never respond to any yes/no question with "Yes SIR!"
                          2) NEVER EVER bring boyfriends home unless you're sure he's "the one" or "expendable"
                          3) Don't change your status to "engaged" on facebook. Unless you are.
                          4) When daddy says "get changed" do it!
                          5) When daddy says anything followed by "that's an order" DO IT FAST!
                          6) No matter what, he's still dad, which means puppy dog eyes and whining voices will get you everywhere.
                          Teacher- "Where do you see yourself in 10 years?"
                          Me- "In the kitchen making my husband a sandwich before he hits me again."
                          Classmate- "You're sick."
                          Me- "Gee, thanks!"

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Chika-Sempai View Post
                            Rules for an army brat-
                            1) Never respond to any yes/no question with "Yes SIR!"
                            2) NEVER EVER bring boyfriends home unless you're sure he's "the one" or "expendable"
                            3) Don't change your status to "engaged" on facebook. Unless you are.
                            4) When daddy says "get changed" do it!
                            5) When daddy says anything followed by "that's an order" DO IT FAST!
                            6) No matter what, he's still dad, which means puppy dog eyes and whining voices will get you everywhere.
                            You forgot:

                            2a) Never bring home a boyfriend who happens to be under Daddy's direct chain of command.


                            "See? That right there is why I check your vagina for traps every time we're about to have sex."

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I think that falls under 'expendable'
                              Chaos is it's own reward

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